


sanctuary

by iidkkdii



Category: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: Billy Cries, Billy Hargrove Needs a Hug, Bring tissues, Child Abuse, Crying, Cuddling & Snuggling, Emotional Abuse, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, Fluff and Angst, Harringrove, Homophobic Language, Homophobic Slurs, Hurt Billy Hargrove, Hurt/Comfort, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Period-Typical Homophobia, Physical Abuse, Protective Steve Harrington, Slurs, Steve Holds It Together, Verbal Abuse, barely, minor PTSD, ongoing abuse, soft
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-15
Updated: 2019-07-15
Packaged: 2020-06-28 18:59:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,065
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19818523
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iidkkdii/pseuds/iidkkdii
Summary: at the risk of sounding disgustingly cheesy...





	sanctuary

billy pulls his camaro over on the way to drop steve off. at first steve doesn’t notice they’d stopped, being too zoned out to pay attention, but when he comes to, he looks over at billy with a look of great confusion. billy stares at the road ahead of them, chewing his lip roughly. 

steve, being the gentle lover he is, reaches over and gently pulls billy’s lip from his teeth. “you shouldn’t bite your lip.” 

“i need to talk to you and you-” even with his face turned away, billy knows steve is about to speak, and so effectively cuts him off. “i need you to be quiet.” 

steve nods, waiting for billy to speak. patiently. 

billy squeezes his eyes shut for a moment, willing back tears. he doesn’t want to be weak in front of steve - steve, who fought demodogs (whatever those are) and steve, who protects children that aren’t even his. brave steve, funny steve, perfect steve. billy squeezes the steering wheel, his knuckles turning white and he jumps when a hand grips his arm. 

he opens his eyes and looks over, finally meeting steve’s eyes. he can feel himself closing off, throwing up those walls he had to work so hard to tear down so he could be honest with, not only himself, but also steve. billy wants so badly to lean in, to kiss steve, to let steve kiss away his pain, kiss away the problems. heal the issues. heal the hurt. 

he can’t - he needs to tell steve about what’s going on. needs to. steve needs to know. 

“my dad…” billy starts, quiet, chest tight. 

steve’s face softens and his hand slips down billy’s arm to loosen one of his hands off the wheel and lace their fingers together. steve’s thumb runs over billy’s knuckles and steve kisses his hand. “you don’t have to tell me, love. not here, it can wait." 

billy shakes his head and averts his eyes, focusing on steve's leg. steve raises his other hand and lifts billy's face up. 

"i'll drive, okay? you don't have go home tonight. my parents aren't home," steve says quietly. "let's switch seats." 

reluctantly, billy gets out of his camaro and lets steve guide him to the passenger seat, buckling him in and closing the door. steve gets in the driver's seat and puts the car in gear to drive them to his house. 

the whole way there, billy leans his head on the window and stares outside, watching the darkness whirl by. he holds steve's hand like a lifeline. 

when they arrive, steve helps billy out, and billy, once again, lets steve guide him inside and to his bedroom. steve carefully gets billy out of his shirt and jeans, tossing them on the floor and puts his boyfriend in some more comfortable clothing - sweatpants. steve quickly changes himself into a different pair of the same pants. 

once he stops moving, he lays on the bed and pulls billy down. billy settles himself between steve's legs and rests his cheek on steve's chest, wrapping his arms around steve. steve runs gentle fingers through billy's curls, effectively calming the blond down. 

"do you wanna talk about it?" steve asks quietly after a long silence. 

another silence. it's heavy and uncomfortable for billy, but steve just waits patiently for his boyfriend to talk. 

"my dad…" billy starts. he stops, unsure of how to continue. he wants to tell steve about his home life, how shitty his dad is, how angry he is at his mom for leaving him behind, how  _ tired  _ he is of the… the hurt. 

"it hurts, steve. it just… it just hurts so much," billy murmurs. he closes his eyes and focuses on steve's fingers. 

"what does, love?" steve asks, combing blond curls behind billy's ear. he looks down and watches the part of billy's face he can see. 

billy can hear steve's heartbeat, soft and steady in his ears. he can feel the rise and fall of steve's chest, the inhale and exhale of oxygen. 

his chest tightens and his throat closes, eyes welling up. 

"my dad hits me," billy manages to choke out. "and he calls me names." 

steve's fingers stop momentarily and then start back up. he knows billy has more to say, but he just needs to time to muster up the courage to say it. 

"and it hurts, steve… a lot, it fucking sucks." billy's voice is tight. "the other day he called me a fag for brushing my hair." 

steve runs his fingers down to billy's shoulders, drawing patterns on his skin. he lets billy think. 

“i want out of his house. it’s not even home anymore. home is… at the risk of sounding disgustingly cheesy, home is with you, steve. i can’t leave his house though, because max is still there, and i don’t want to leave her there to suffer him alone, y’know?” billy’s voice suddenly darkens. “i don’t want to be my mom. i don’t want to leave max like my mom left me.” 

“you aren’t your mom, baby. you’re so brave for staying with him for max. you’re so strong.” steve pulls billy up and cups his face, looking into his eyes. “listen, anytime you need to, my room is open to you. my house is open for you and max if you need it. my parents aren’t home ever anyways, so it’s fine.”

fresh tears pool in billy’s red-rimmed baby blues, pouty bottom lip trembling. 

“no one’s been as good to me as you are,” billy whimpers, burying his face into steve’s neck to muffle his sobs. “i don’t deserve you.”

steve wraps his arms around billy, squeezing tightly, letting him cry and get it all out. steve feels the same way - like crying, but he feels like maybe it would be too much for billy, so he bottles it up, staying strong for his boyfriend. 

“you do, you deserve the world, billy,” steve whispers, running gentle hands up and down billy’s back. “i’m gonna do my best to give it to you.” 

it’s ripping steve’s heart out to hear billy cry like this, unrelenting and torrenting. a hurricane in full force, and he’s failed to evacuate in time - not that would want to. billy’s been alone for eighteen years, he doesn’t need to be alone anymore. 

billy won’t be alone ever again. not when steve’s here. 

**Author's Note:**

> made myself cry lol


End file.
